Begin Your I-485 Residency While Missing Your Country

If you think about someone every day, but never see them, what happens when they die? Does the missing morph into regret? Or does it remain a missing?  Is indifference the best weapon against those negative thoughts, or acceptance?

For immigrants, a new beginning in the States usually marks an ending to a life with friends and family in a prior country.  Life here never marks an end to what I call “the missing” – a longing for the good times that used to be. My mother, Candida Morales, sang When I Left Cuba throughout my childhood. Though the singing stopped, her missing remains 56 years after she fled her homeland.

Work and Travel While Waiting for I-485 Green Card

Ironically, those who miss their home country most should be the ones who file for a green card fastest. A noncitizen can ask for an international travel permit to return to a home country (not in the case of I-589 asylees) when they file for residency. They can also file for an I-765 work permit together with the I-485 green card.

It is the stickiness of life. Refusing to go forward — to get the American green card – prevents noncitizens from going back, with much needed money for relatives.

I-485 Green Card through Marriage

This stickiness shows up in other ways. Longing to heal and repair a relationship with a prior boyfriend or girlfriend also prevents noncitizens from beginning a new relationship. Perhaps with a US citizen. Perhaps with a green card holder. Without marriage, a noncitizen cannot apply for an I-485 green card through marriage.

I know this stickiness from personal experience. I know about pining for an impossible love. While it improves the quality of Love Actually, a popular holiday rom com, this missing is not productive. My missing will one day morph into regret, should he die first. Having no other option, I will ice skate, read, join a pickleball league, travel internationally with my dog, practice French on Tandem, and try not to kill family members with the terrible quality of my cooking. It is possible to hold two opposing sides – the missing and the going forward – in one soul.

Disclaimer – These entries are based on real life events. Family member names, when used, are real. Client names are changed for privacy.

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